Friday, March 25, 2011

two sides, but how many coins?

you could call it a silver lining, but i prefer to look at it as "half empty". the joys of wisconsin weather that is.

take pumping milk for example. when it is frigid, i curse the arctic air as i pump milk in my car "at work". since i work out of my car, that is my office! as work places are required by law to have a place where nursing moms can pump milk, i offer a luxurious reclining front seat, radio with cd player, and even a cup holder. however climate control is often a bit rough as the car seems to cool off considerably after being turned off for an hour. brr. exposed breasts are cold breasts.

it stands to reason that with warm weather i will stop complaining, but unfortunately my memory is too good to claim that. back in july and september I was busy whining about trying to keep the pumped milk cold in the car all day long. loading (and unloading) my car daily with my workbag and laptop, my lunch, my water bottle, a separate cooler of milk for baby and toddler at daycare, diapers and wipes for daycare, breastpump and bottles, inhaler for toddler, and a baby in a carrier was just about all i could handle. add another cooler and ice pack and i would tip over. onto the ground. and it is very hard to get up holding all the aforementioned things.

Monday, March 21, 2011

baby olympics

imagine an Olympic diver. she has just moments before entering the water to twist, turn, contort, flex and extend. amazing. now picture that same Olympic diver at 11 months and i can tell you what she is doing: twisting, turning, contorting, flexing and extending! all this while her buns are covered in poo. baby L's new extreme sport is diaper wrestling while mom and dad attempt to clean crevices and fasten BOTH sides of the diaper to her wriggling, inverted body (sorry, no partial credit for one side of a diaper...falls right off you'll soon find).

i am very relieved to know that our baby monitor is pointed at the crib and not the changing table. i thought only turtles could bend their necks that far!? i glance guiltily over my shoulder as i try to pin her down hoping these memories leave no scar (on me!... i mean HER). occasionally i can distract her with something really good like a fragile, electronic device or a bottle with a choking sized cap... and curse the articles and books that led me to believe that babies actually want to have a clean diaper. those were obviously written by someone with a twisted, turning, contorting sense of humor.

Saturday, March 12, 2011

why we weren't in madison... today

what to write about? the return of shark teeth to mom's nipple or yet another day of toddler sickness in 2011? why not both? kind of a "kick her while she's down" feature!
the author of my feeding book mentions she is surprised by the high rate that kids are ill: approximately 6-12 times per year. however, when i read that statistic, i felt pure envy. ONLY 6-12 times? how lovely, how manageable!
as we have already been to urgent care several times this year and are on day 5 of a high fever, i can only daydream. but sick kids aren't that surprising. these are the same darlings who attempt to eat rocks and table legs, and i find myself a little behind when it comes to sanitizing such items...
however, what to do with these ill children when both parents are working? and grandma is working? and grandpa is in las vegas? and no one (including school and day care) wants to snuggle up with the little germballs?
dad "working from home" is becoming more hilarious by the day. instead of rocking in a swing, baby L is reading all the books (with her teeth) and pulling up to stand (using the open toilet). it used to be that toddler C could be entertained by a favorite video, but for some reason he is not as easily pacified when he hears Diego's voice but sees an 11 month old slapping the television (i guess we do need a wall mounted flat screen afterall).
i have flexed my flexible job to the near breaking point with rearranged schedules and days off. how do women working full-time, inflexible jobs do it? i sure don't know. and in our 'freetime' we are still trying to pump milk!!
which brings us back (sort of) to baby land shark. she has now thankfully changed her nibbling technique from the clamp and pull (in order to detach mom's nipple, presumably) to the snapping turtle bite and hold. at least with the bite and hold i know that she is merely expressing recently learned lessons about the resistance movement and how to stand your ground, which she obviously picked up the day we did go to rally in madison.