Hey! Unto You A Child Is Born!

Pandemonium
Two (and a half!)  Christmas cookies for C. today was "one too many" according to Dad as a flash of limbs blurs by us.  "Careful!" I say more than (insert large number here) times, sometimes before the crash, sometimes after.
Balance.  Rhythm.  Priorities.
These themes surface more and more now that I am of "advanced maternal age".    And yet, Pandemonium reigns.  Well maybe it doesn't reign, but it sure rains down upon us often enough.
Advent and preparing for Christmas has always been a special, favorite time for me.  Advent wreath lighting, advent calendars (sometimes hand wrapped messages from mom), watering a real tree in our home, setting up the Nativity scene, decorating sugar cookies, even circling rock tumblers and easy bake ovens in the JC Penney catalog... what's not to like?
Now that I have children of my own, I realize that what made it into our lives and traditions must have in fact been very deliberate.  The amount expected to be crammed into this season is hectic and overwhelming, and even pandemonium inducing.  Without some sense of balance and priorities you are likely to be run over by a reindeer.
As toddler L. sings "Dudo" the red nose reindeer, I realize that although animated reindeer are not on top of our holiday priority list, music is.  Although I favor some of the more religious, heart wrenching tunes (What Child Is This, O Holy Night), little C. would be happy to keep "Albert" and the Chipmunks on repeat.  Watching my kids dance along with records just as we did, gives a very warm feeling indeed. 
Tripping along is how we are doing in regard to the rest of our traditions.
St. Nicholas did come!  Luckily we forgot to check our stockings in the morning as they weren't actually filled until a bit later.
The tree was decorated... not a real one... not white lights... But pleasantly weighted down with 3-4 ornaments per branch by toddler L.
We do have an Advent calendar on the wall and remember to read it... at least every day or two.
The Nativity scene is up, but C. made our stable out of a Melissa and Doug frog, singing tea kettle and lavender pillow (so the angel could look down where he lay)  :) There may also be a chip in baby Jesus, but I am not exactly sure when this occurred. 
We light a candle at dinner, but only tonight (on the second Sunday of Advent) do I realize it's C.'s Thanksgiving candle and maybe we should have moved on to Advent candles by now...
No decorating of sugar cookies (thanks Mom!, that must have been a lot of work!!), but we did mix up some Puppy Chow and Krispy Treats.
We have no art project's involving  a child's hand or footprint yet (we need Erica to help us with those anyway), but we did make some potpourri and wreaths!  Wreaths were possibly my favorite activity with C. this year because they were made with Daddy's old 45 records on a day that was exceptionally warm.  They were absolutely free to make and they turned out cute!  C. wanted to stay out cutting branches (from our bushes) all day!
Priorities?  Time together.  Treats.  Traditions.  Music.  Making. 
Balance?  Involving the senses of smell, taste, sight, touch, sound.  And as my children remind me, movement! 
Rhythm?  Well, maybe next year!
Happy Holidays to you and yours!!

the weekend toddler L really started talking

It was a Cinco de Mayo just like any other; lounging poolside following a candlelit dinner celebrating our close friends' marriage in Palm Springs, California.  Sipping margaritas that were like sampling a fruit and veggie platter, full of fresh cucumbers and handmade by the groom...
Well by now you may have guessed, I  never really had a Cinco de Mayo quite like this before.. The moments captured that weekend left me both reaching and remembering.
A weekend drenched with the luxuries of sweet sun, mountain backdrop, cool pool water, not to mention delicious food with every lift of the fork.  But also the luxuries bestowed only upon parents vacationing away from their children.  Vacating?  A vacancy and void that allows you to stay up as late as you once did, to drink more than you lately have, to sleep (without one eye open) for more hours than you have in at least a year.
I mourn my old identity that carried the irresponsibility of independence.  Knowing I could do whatever I please and make it back safe and sound no matter how many roads less traveled I chose.
We strolled through a second hand store without having to wrangle children into a shopping cart.  I was able to wander at my own pace, meeting up with my honey from time to time throughout the store.  It wasn't just a mission just to get through without breaking anything or a rush past my favorite glassware to get to the toy section.  It was so enjoyable.
It was so nice to have "couple time" with my spouse. And talk to him.  To talk when I wasn't completely exhausted.
It was so nice to see friends.  And talk with them. And listen with both ears instead of one.  To make spontaneous plans with them!
It was so nice to see the bride and groom surrounded by people, (pets) and images held dear to them.  Simply put, to feel the open exchange of good energy from good people, and without the constant distractions that parenthood brings.
And yet, can it be anything but bittersweet to find yourself in a hotel swimming pool without your children?  As fun as it is to watch Kevin put his head under water, it's just not the same thrill as when little C or L do it and come up sputtering and grinning.  So I'm left reaching and remembering.  Wanting to hold everything all at once.  Appreciating.

Quality Control

2012 has brought some very mild, new year's resolutions. Rather than lofty outcomes, I wanted to engage in meaningful processes. I broke it down into 4 categories and have been trying to do something from each category everyday... or at least every couple days. (The idea being to support and encourage myself rather than berate myself for failure.)

1. Giving! I've got a groovy husband, sweet kids, supportive family, house, vehicles, plenty of food, Health, a good job, thoughtful friends, heat, running/clean/hot water. And quite honestly, in comparison to what I have been blessed with, I share very little. Like a percentage of a percent. So in my effort to be more aware and give more I have:
Shared Paczki with my patients, taught Yoga at C's school, signed up with Interfaith to be an occasional driver, brought cupcakes to the neighbors, donated clothes/books/ toys to a family that lost their possessions in a fire.

2. Receiving! Even with all I have to be thankful for (see above), I often feel exhausted and frustrated. I take SO much for granted. I want to be more aware of positive energies, thoughts, and actual things flowing into my life. So far in my attempt at grace-filled receiving I have accepted:
An entire weekend of childcare from my parents, a free drink and chips at the bar from my favorite wedding officiant, a Valentine from C.C. , giggles from Lulu, orange juice when I was sick from Kevs, and a nap both to myself and from myself.

3. Creating! This is one aspect of myself that I have let slip away to some extent since filling my life with a spouse and kids. Lack of time is somewhat to blame, but I know it doesn't take much time to add creativity to everyday activities. So with a little effort we were able to:
Do chalk drawings outside (it's been a mild winter!), stamp cards and decorate gift bags, create Mardi Gras masks, make tub paint for the kids bathtime, make a set of thank you cards for a glowing Bride to Be, make Valentines, write a poem, and work on a handmade recipe book.

4. Moving! This is a nice way of telling myself to exercise more. And to enjoy it! And that it doesn't need to be difficult, complex or painful. And that my family is depending on me to be around for a while. That involves me participating in some sort of exercise for my sake, their sake and as an example for my kids of how to do it.
Well this has been the hardest for me so far. It usually consists of doing some quick exercise before bed when I realize I haven't done anything all day.
Most pitiful journal entries include, things like "knee bends", "squats" or "hip circles". As in, I did 15 knee bends in an entire day...
Most proud moment... leading that Kids Yoga Class! (and seeing all those little 3,4, and 5 year old "trees" attempting to reach and balance in unison)

Well it's 9:15. Time to do some paperwork and then maybe a few sit-ups...

they say the darndest things

Sometimes what kids say (or hear!) is good for a chuckle. Sadly, I forget most of these hilarious comments, but here are a few that have not yet floated away.
When Big Brother C was angry at his teacher he exclaimed, "I'm gonna get Mrs. Becker!..." (He saw mom's eyebrows go up) and quickly added, "A present". Good save kid, good save.

Or when I didn't want to discourage him from eating a healthy dinner by letting him know what was really in it. I told daddy there were hidden V-E-G-E-T-A-B-L-E-S in it. Four year old C looks at me with wide eyes and asks "Really?" I am so impressed! When has he learned to spell?! Until he adds, "There are REAL letters in this?"

What about Toddler L? Well, I put on her mittens and she says, "AHHHH, NOO!" and shakes her hands vigorously until mittens fly into snowbanks. Then she notices her exposed, cold fingers and shrieks, AHHH, NOOO!" So mommy offers her the now slightly damp mittens and she responds, "Why thank you mama, you are ever so kind. Please forgive me for my previous outburst." Or something like that.

Twas the Night Before Christmas...

I find Christmas Eve a night of trying to fit everything else in, so why not a blog post?
Thinking about multitasking makes me feel tired, but framed as "hitting two birds with one stone" or finding the "silver lining" in a task, these ideas breeze by as smooth and efficient!
Why not:
1. Use up old Metamucil cookies while also providing a sweet treat for Santa?
2. Get the kitchen floor swept of dried crumbs and vegetables, and package the contents as soup mixes to use as last minute holiday gifts?
3. Allow husband to nap, while stealthily sampling vacation chocolates? i mean, wrapping gifts for him!
4. Mop the kitchen floor in preparation for holiday guests and so I no longer have to walk around the spot that toddler L pooed on yesterday?
5. Hang up Christmas cards to provide Holiday Decor while simultaneously de-cluttering the counter?
6. Plan for Red and Green Christmas Smoothies tomorrow morning (Grandpa Frank says use mostly fruit and sneak in a few frozen veggies) that also find a home for our overripe bananas?
7. Munch on those cookies sitting out for Santa while also addressing chronic constip....
SORRY OUT OF TIME! GOTTA GO WRAP GIFTS! Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night!!

Cold Season Already?

Well it's only October, but 3:4 members of this family have already weathered colds. Side effects around the house?
GROSSEST: Big Kid C's garbage can overflowing with used Kleenex... spilled all over the floor
SADDEST: Toddler L's being treated with 3 prescriptions because they weren't sure which of the 3 ailments she really had...
FUNNIEST: Immediately after Daddy clears his throat in the morning, Toddler L attempts to make the same noise. hilarious.
And while on the topic of funny noises, might I mention that Toddler L loves to mimic all funny noises, especially the bodily functions? Just when you think you've gotten away with an unnoticed "toot", you hear an echo from the other room, "ENNNK!"

Memories of Moms and Grandmas

I also wanted to share what my Mom and I read at my Grandma's Memorial Service in June so that it won't be lost..


Our Memories

As I write these memories, the lines blur between memories of my Grandma with family memories of moms and daughters.
I can see Grandma Irene offering my daughter Lucy a toy with a sweet intensity. For that moment they are lost in each others eyes. The kind smile she offers her great-grandaughter is one that has been shared with me and my cousins, as well as her own daughters and son.

Katy: I remember being 4 or 5 years old and licking the beaters offered by mom own mom as she recalls memories from her childhood.

Margie: I can still remember licking the spoon to taste the batter of Mom's Mazola cake, our first cake with oil rather than shortening.

Both: We remember dipping the bottom of a glass into sugar to press dough balls into cookies. And flouring the table to roll and cut Mom's sugar cookies.

Both: And your memories are mine, and mine are yours until they become our memories

Margie: I remember standing on a picnic table with Mom, as we listened to Roy Orbison at Summerfest. And our excitement of flying to New York City together to see Dione Warwick.

Both: We remember visiting the Polish craft booths and sampling foods together at folk fair.

Both: And your memories are my memories and mine are yours until they become ours

Katy: I remember counting deer out the window on our way to the Wisconsin Dells with Grandpa and Grandma.

Margie: I remember the long car ride to and hot summer of Hayward, Wisconsin with my family.

Margie: Do you remember having our Easter baskets and Easter meal blessed on Holy Saturday?

Both: Do you remember Grandma's pudding cake, and her Lamb Cake, and singing Happy Birthday to Jesus?

Both: And your memories are mine and mine are yours until they become ours

Katy: I remember magical moments in Grandma's piano room, surrounded by cousins and plants. I remember pricking my finger on Grandma's cactus that looked soft and fuzzy. And of sitting at the piano learning to sing a Christmas carol in Polish.

Margie: I remember how Mom sewed many of our clothes. I remember the soft velvet top and satin bottom of the special Christmas dresses she made for us.

Both: Through her hands, her heart, and her prayers Grandma/ Mom showed us her love.

Margie: Thank you Mom for bringing us an appreciation for the small things in life:
Reading a good book, playing a game of Yatzee, and enjoying Quality Fairy Food.

Katy: Thank you for a lifetime of memories. We love you and will miss you dearly.